Thomas Reynolds

Thomas Linh Reynolds was born near Saigon Vietnam on Oct 20, 1974 and died peacefully at home with his loving family surrounding him on June 25, 2015.
Tom was adopted by his parents, Dave and Harriet Reynolds of Iowa City, IA, in April 1975. Tom married Jeff Alan Anderson on Dec 23, 2013 after a loving 15 year commitment. They established their home in Maryland. In 2008, they adopted Jordan Thanh Anderson, 8 years old, at age 1 ½ from an orphanage near Hanoi, Vietnam. In 2011, they adopted Greyson Cole Reynolds, 4 years old, as an infant, who was born in Bettendorf, Iowa.

Tom is survived by his husband Jeff Anderson, children Jordan Anderson and Greyson Reynolds, parents Dave and Harriet Reynolds, father-in-law Louie Anderson, sister Judith (Reynolds) Armstrong (Robert), three nephews Zachary, Nathan and Noah Armstrong, sister-in-law Pam Anderson, nephews Zach Broder and PJ Perry, sister-in-law Sue Billesbach, nephew Kaleb, brother-in-law Lynn Anderson (Lori) nephew Josh, and niece Sarah, his aunts Betty Richardson and Donna Anderson, an uncle Jim Reynolds (Ava), and numerous cousins.

He was preceded in death by his maternal grandparents Harlie and Nina Hatfill, his paternal grandparents Curt and Marion Reynolds, Uncles Tom Richardson and Bruce Reynolds, a cousin William Anderson and Mother-in law, Charlotte Anderson.

Services are private.

Celebration of Life for Tom will be held at two locations/dates:

Maryland Celebration:

Thursday July 16, 2015
11AM to 2PM
Kenwood Golf and Country Club
5601 River Road
Bethesda, MD 20816
(301) 320-3000

Please join us for a casual luncheon to celebrate Tom’s life. If you like you will have an opportunity to share stories or fun memorable moments that you had.

Iowa Celebration:

Thursday July 23, 2015
3:30PM to 6:30PM
University Club
1360 Melrose Ave
Iowa City, IA 52246
(319) 338-5439

Please join us for a casual celebration of life for Tom including light fare. You will have the opportunity to share insightful or humorous stories if you wish.

In lieu of flowers, donations in memory of Tom Reynolds can be made to:

Chris4Life Colon Cancer Foundation
8330 Boone Blvd. Suite 450
Vienna, VA 22182
http://www.chris4life.org/ select donate

or

Montgomery Hospice
1355 Piccard Drive, Suite 100
Rockville, MD 20850
www.montgomeryhospice.org select donate

Tom attended Solon, Iowa elementary and high schools prior to attending the University of Iowa in Iowa City. He started violin in preschool and later moved on to piano, oboe, and clarinet. He participated in the University of Iowa Hawkeye Marching Band for three years.

At the University of Iowa, he majored in Civil Engineering and minored in Japanese. He worked at various engineering firms continually improving his skills and knowledge. He was currently working at URS/AECOM.

After meeting his life partner Jeff Anderson in 2000, he moved to Maryland. In 2008 when their daughter Jordan Thanh Anderson was 1 ½ years old, Tom and Jeff traveled to Vietnam for her adoption. Jordan is now 8 years old. In 2011 when their son Greyson Cole Reynolds was a few hours old, they traveled to Bettendorf, IA for his adoption. Greyson is now 4 years old

In recent years, Tom’s job was focused on structural engineering and project management, especially working with FEMA on design, community implementation, construction, and follow-up of safe rooms.

Tom’s unfinished life was anything but ordinary. “Roller coaster” has frequently been an attribute of his life and those around him.

Six months after birth, Tom left war torn Vietnam on the first government sponsored Operation Babylift flight, three weeks prior to the fall of Saigon. The ill-fated flight crashed shortly after takeoff, killing 78 of the orphans. Tom’s then three year old sister Judi, recalls watching TV news coverage and crying with us. Due to the loss of records in the crash, the ongoing war, and the emergency transition to Operation Babylift plan B, we had no idea if Tom was onboard the first flight, a later flight, let alone alive, injured, or dead. Six days later we received a call from our Denver agency that Tom was safe in the US after an intensive ID and location process with very few information pieces. The next day an agency volunteer unceremoniously delivered Tom to us at the Cedar Rapids Iowa Airport.

So began Tom’s first six months, punctuated by a roller coaster of events and emotions. In comparison, the next 38 years were quite normal. Tom enjoyed transformers, playing and fishing with friends and neighbors, developed a knack for music (piano, violin, obo, and clarinet), developed a long lasting fascination with roller coasters, participated in soccer, school sports, school plays, and band, enjoyed being a Japanese summer foreign exchange student, and was always an honor roll student. We relished the loving relationship Judi and Tom had.

By now, Tom’s talk about building roller coasters became more of a career interest. College at the University of Iowa presented the opportunity to participate in the Hawkeye Marching Band for three years, a major in Civil Engineering (with a keen interest in structural engineering and management), and a minor in Japanese. He established many college friendships that he and Jeff have very actively maintained.

He brought to his first Richmond, VA engineering job, an intense interest to succeed and to continue learning, to work closely with and manage people and projects, a happy disposition, great smile, and an adventure oriented lifestyle (skydiving, rock climbing, scuba diving). His interest in building roller coasters morphed into building bridges. He was elated when later he passed his Professional Engineering (PE) certification, allowing him to sign off on construction projects. Shortly thereafter in 2000, Tom introduced us to the love of his life, Jeff, followed by another job change and a move to Maryland where Jeff lived and the beginning of their life together.

While on a scuba diving trip to Thailand, Tom and Jeff joined an Operation Babylift adoptee crash survivor reunion being held in Vietnam in 2005. They met a few of Tom’s orphanage caregivers and toured relevant parts of the Saigon, and visited the crash site. While Tom previously had at most only a passing interest in revisiting Vietnam or anything of his heritage, he and Jeff were overwhelmed with reality and emotion of this encounter which led to the next big change in their life. They immediately began the long arduous process of foreign adoption. We were ecstatic to be invited to join them in Oct 2008, for a 3 week trip with their agency and 5 sets of adoptee parents to get Jordan from her orphanage near Hanoi, Vietnam. Prior to joining the adoption group, Tom and Jeff retraced with us, their steps from their trip three years previously around Saigon including meeting Tom’s 1974/1975 Vietnamese caregivers. These memories bring both happy smiles and tears as we are confronted with the realization that Tom’s first 6 months were tenuous and also filled with love from the nuns and Vietnamese women that cared for him. Two and a half years later they adopted Greyson at birth in Bettendorf Iowa with the help of very long term family friends; an interesting story in its own right.

Two beautiful kids, Jeff’s sister Pam living with them to help with the kids and the house, two excellent jobs, a nice home, enjoying family gatherings and cousins…. life couldn’t be better for the whole family. After the contentious period of state’s rights and gay marriage was resolved for Maryland, they got married on Dec 23, 2013. Top of the rollercoaster!

In early Feb 2014, the all too familiar emotional rollercoaster powered into a gut wrenching high speed descent: Tom was diagnosed with stage IV colorectal cancer. As described various times in blogs and emails, we all were truly on a totally different emotional roller coaster during the sometimes promising but often depressing treatments. Emotional lows are to be expected, but the relative highs truly were celebrated with as much life as we dared dish out. Lots of family visits, many visits for emotional and physical support, doctor visits, etc., and many trips to help on a number of house projects, kid play days sometimes including older cousins (they are beyond fantastic). In March 2015, Tom, friends, and family participated in a Chris4Life colon cancer run/walk fund raiser in DC. His URS/AECOM work group organized Tom’s Tornados team, the second highest fundraising team. Tom and Jeff hosted a joyful welcome party at their house the day prior to the event for all the team members, which included 11 family and friends from all over the country. Everyone is still talking about this joyous event and you could see from Tom’s big smile that he was loving it!

During Tom’s aggressive treatment and his subsequent Hospice care, we came to understand the full breadth of energy, compassion, drive, and soul that Tom possessed. During a large playhouse building project involving many co-workers, friends and family, Tom managed the project like…. well, like the efficient project leader that he was. We could easily sense the devotion, friendship, comradery, humor, efficiency, and other attributes we would continue to learn from co-workers: that was just how Tom was. During the last couple of weeks we have met so many people that admired Tom and shared stories: Tom was a mentor, an instructor, a strong advocate for issues important to him, and a spread-sheet guru. We were given copies of FEMA standards booklets that Tom and others co-authored; Tom was instrumental in safe room standards advancement and community and contractor education. The work he and others have done has and will continue to save lives.

The plane crash and the cancer diagnosis were the bookends of his otherwise happy, successful, fulfilling, and promising life. During Hospice care his family provided comforting, consoling, nurturing, and whispered words. The caressing, and embracing reminded us of infant-like care we could not provide during his first six months before Tom came into our family. Through Tom’s illness, we have gained a rare insight into his already admirable character. We love you Tom.