Obituaries

Lydia de Lagarde
B: 1928-04-04
D: 2018-06-19
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de Lagarde, Lydia
Tahir Thomas
B: 2018-05-25
D: 2018-06-12
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Thomas, Tahir
Marc Ballereau
B: 1980-12-01
D: 2018-06-12
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Ballereau, Marc
Foong Chu
B: 1923-08-26
D: 2018-06-01
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Chu, Foong
Obiajulu Okadigbo
B: 1987-11-09
D: 2018-05-29
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Okadigbo, Obiajulu
Dimitri Pak
B: 1930-05-05
D: 2018-05-23
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Pak, Dimitri
Alexis Michael
B: 1947-01-13
D: 2018-05-22
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Michael, Alexis
Sue Daoulas
B: 1957-08-12
D: 2018-05-16
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Daoulas, Sue
John Mertz
B: 1999-10-01
D: 2018-05-14
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Mertz, John
Nelia Clark
B: 1957-08-19
D: 2018-05-14
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Clark, Nelia
James McKay
B: 1986-11-27
D: 2018-05-10
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McKay, James
Mary Throckmorton
B: 1921-04-13
D: 2018-05-08
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Throckmorton, Mary
Teresa Linares
B: 1958-10-01
D: 2018-05-06
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Linares, Teresa
Kalidas Sengupta
B: 1924-01-01
D: 2018-04-30
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Sengupta, Kalidas
Mary Rogers
B: 1933-06-16
D: 2018-04-28
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Rogers, Mary
Lillian McBride
B: 1921-06-17
D: 2018-04-26
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McBride, Lillian
Charles Bittner
B: 1926-11-18
D: 2018-04-23
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Bittner, Charles
Geraldine Washington
B: 1928-02-24
D: 2018-04-22
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Washington, Geraldine
Serafina Richards
B: 1947-08-05
D: 2018-04-22
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Richards, Serafina
Edgar Franco Castillo
B: 1955-08-02
D: 2018-04-18
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Franco Castillo, Edgar
Thomas McLaren
B: 1942-10-30
D: 2018-04-16
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McLaren, Thomas

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Grieving with Purpose

No one is prepared for grief. The rush of feelings, the thoughts, anxieties, and heartache can take us by surprise and drive us to our knees. Yet, when we choose to harness that power for self-growth, amazing things can happen. Good can come from pain.

Sigmund Freud first brought up the concept of grief work in 1917, and today the idea that bereavement is purpose-driven continues.

Dr. James Worden chose to see the work of bereavement as task-oriented:

Stages of Grief 

stages of grief Thibadeau Mortuary Service

Your current job is to focus your attention on achieving each of those goals. It will not occur in any logical order; each of us is different and the path we walk in the bereavement journey is not a straight one.

Dealing with grief is hard work. It takes both courage and hard work to successfully adapt to the loss of a significant person in your life.

Six Signposts Along Your Journey

Dr. Stephen Joseph identifies what he calls six signposts to facilitate posttraumatic growth. He reminds readers too that "posttraumatic growth does not imply the absence of emotional distress and difficulties in living. It does imply that it is possible through the struggle to come out on the other side, stronger and more philosophical about life."

Before identifying these six signposts, Dr. Joseph reminds his readers of three very important things:

  • You are not on your own
  • Trauma is a normal and natural process
  • Growth is a journey

He also provides a fundamental rule: don't do anything you might not be able to handle now. "If you experience intense emotions, become physically upset, or begin to panic...stop." He gently reminds readers that "having a sense of personal control over your recovery is important. There might be some things you do not feel ready to handle now, but in time, as you discover new strength and develop new coping skills, this will likely change."

six signposts grief recovery Thibadeau Mortuary Service


"By focusing on these six signposts," writes Dr. Joseph, "you will find that your posttraumatic growth is beginning to take root."

Sources: 
Freud, Sigmund. On the History of the Psycho-Analytic Movement Papers on Metaphyschology and Other Works.
Worden, James. Grief Counseling & Grief Therapy: A Handbook for the Mental Health Practitioner

Fleming, Stephen. The Changing Face of Grief: From 'Going On to 'On-Going''
Joseph, Stephen. What Doesn't Kill Us: the New Psychology of Posttraumatic Growth

365 Days of Healing

Grieving doesn't always end with the funeral: subscribe to our free daily grief support email program, designed to help you a little bit every day, by filling out the form below.

52 Weeks of Support

It's hard to know what to say when someone experiences loss. Our free weekly newsletter provides insights, quotes and messages on how to help during the first year.